I remember the neckcurls, limp and damp as tendrils;
And her quick look, a sidelong pickerel smile;
And how, once started into talk, the light syllables leaped for her.
And she balanced in the delight of her thought,
A wren, happy, tail into the wind,
Her song trembling the twigs and small branches.
The shade sang with her;
The leaves, their whispers turned to kissing,
And the mould sang in the bleached valleys under the rose.
Oh, when she was sad, she cast herself down into such a pure depth,
Even a father could not find her:
Scraping her cheek against straw,
Stirring the clearest water.
My sparrow, you are not here,
Waiting like a fern, making a spiney shadow.
The sides of wet stones cannot console me,
Nor the moss, wound with the last light.
If only I could nudge you from this sleep,
My maimed darling, my skittery pigeon.
Over this damp grave I speak the words of my love:
I, with no rights in this matter,
Neither mother nor father nor brother.
-Theodore Roethke
5 comments:
OMG! I happened to be googling my old friend Jules from my college days and found this. We were Ecology & Evolutionary Biology majors at the U of A in Tucson, and we often played pool in various hangouts on 4th Avenue. She was a friend when I needed one, and she unwittingly introduced me to my future husband. Last time I saw her was after graduation, before she returned home to Milwaukee. I gave her some homemade apricot liquor, and she pedaled away on her bike into the night. I am heartbroken to hear this very sad news!!! :((
Jutta: It is very sad. I dated her brother Bryan for about 18 months, until we broke up this past November. I will be at the service for her in Milwaukee on the 17th. Would you like me to pass on anything?
Thank you Copper Dog, please contact me: jutta@filzmail.com. I'm still trying to absorb all this, but I should have something ready this weekend. Thank you kindly for offering to pass this on.
It's strange ... last time Jules and I connected was 10, maybe 11 years ago. We e-mailed back and forth a bit after she left Tucson, but eventually our lives drifted apart; you know how it is.
Then out of the blue I get this "hmmm, wonder what Jules is up to" only to find out she passed away a few days ago. Sometimes I wonder if we remain somehow connected to friends and acquaintances from our past, in ways that we can't explain or comprehend.
Looking forward to your e-mail. JH
I have created an Online Guestbook for Jules, here's the link:
http://www.legacy.com/JSOnline/GB/GuestbookView.aspx?PersonId=122712949
My eulogy (it's long) should appear soon. If you could pass it on, or point friends/relatives to the above URL, that would be wonderful.
Thank you so much, and please forward my heartfelt condolences to her parents and brother. I can't imagine what they must be going through right now. Jules is a very hard person to lose.
Peace.
Jutta:
I've passed on your post to Bryan and will be watching for your eulogy. I'll take a copy with me on Saturday, as well. Thank you for setting up the guest book. I had no idea that was even an option. I also passed your email address on to Bryan. I hope that's ok.
With love,
-Copper Dog
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